Hey,
It’s been 8 months since I wrote about my life and posted it here. It was a looong story to tell why. That 8 months seemed to passed by really fast. But here I am sharing again my life. :)
In about less than 30 days, I will be celebrating an anniversary — as a corporate-free man. 30th of June 2017 was my, should I say, ‘parole’. Like a ‘prisoner’, I was happy at first because I could breathe fresher air and hopeful of a brand new life. I thought my dreams are within reach. I always believe that I can do all things. haha. However, I only saw just the tip of the iceberg. Mas mahirap pala to be out of the corporate world.
My life felt like a disaster.
I would cry myself to sleep at night a lot of times. I felt insecure and uncertain. I felt that the people close to me do not believe in my dreams. I was very anxious and worried for my family. I felt like the world is now against me.
But day by day, I felt like a message was being passed on to me — To learn and to realize that the world outside the corporate world is not an easy battlefield. Slowly, I felt like I was learning the lessons God wants me to realize. For the past 8 months, I’d like to share with you how it impacted my life and what I am now.
- Anxiety will not do any good
Obviously, it won’t but it’s human nature to worry about the future. Though I can say that it’s normal, it goes beyond the limit when it stopped you from working on your goals and your daily activities. I had it for how many times in the past 8 months. I just laid in bed, cry and think of what I have done. I had sleep problems for consecutive days. I even thought that maybe it’s depression and maybe I need professional help? But my strong side kicked in and said to myself, ‘hey, nothing has ever come easy.’ Work on it. Laban lang!’
My family has always been my source of strength. I learned in the past 8 months that overthinking and too much anxiousness will not do any good. Opportunities will not just come to you. You have to chase after it. While luck plays a good role, you don’t wait for it to happen. I’d rather say, blessing will not come to you if you didn’t work for it.
- Some ‘packages’ just need to let go
When I resigned from my job, I suddenly felt the pressure of holding on with my life. That time, I have no stable income. I was only starting to go full time with my photobooth business. My van rental is not doing well. I was undecided to continue our dishwashing liquid business. My online business has made no impact after my first sale. While at the same time, expenses are piling up. All of these things caused worries and anxiety to me. I thought after I left my job, everything will come easy because I have these plans. However, I was wrong. Dinamdam ko lahat. I was very emotional when I realized I was failing. But that’s the mistake I made. I carried everything for how many months thinking maybe one day, some of these will leave by themselves. But it’s not. You are the captain of your ship. You decide.
I started telling my story and my struggles to my sister. She helped me emotionally and financially. We decided to let her manage the van rental business and its expenses after I asked if she can handle it kasi di ko na kaya yung expenses. I was relieved by that burden being off the list.
Do not hesitate to ask for help if you need to. Let go of the loads you do not need in your journey. Share your story to someone who will understand your situation. Sometimes, some ‘packages’ just need to be shared to someone who knows you and willing to be with you.
When I decided to open up and accept my failures, I felt like I was given a second chance to try again. I was happy to know that some people will just accept your failure and still believe in your dreams. Remember that it is always the journey that matters, not the destination. I was blinded to appreciate the efforts I have done for the past months not realizing that I have tried so many things that others have not. Just don’t compare your finances and lifestyle to them because that will make you insecure. haha. Maybe not now. I’m keeping it in my head that I took the long and harder road than the safe and easy ones. A coach once said to me, ‘Live like no one else so that, later, you can live like no one else.’
- You’ll discover the things you didn’t know you can
Right now, my photobooth business is a little bit stable. I have consistent number of customers since January of this year. It has become my major source of income. I am earning almost the same of what I was earning in my previous job. But this time, I have a lot of time for myself and for other things I wanna do.
In that regard, I just accept whatever opportunities that come to me since I have a lot of time. I do some freelance photography for event and photoshoots for kids which I really enjoyed a lot. Hehe. I even accepted web design projects which I nailed too. Presently, I accepted a software-development project for a small business in Davao. I have done it years before so I think I can do it again and make it my stepping stone for a startup tech company. I enrolled myself to an online course for some refresher. Fortunately, I’m already in the middle of the project.
I realized that when you have a lot of time and you are the kind of person who wants to make use of time to the best he can, you can think of starting doing something you haven’t tried before and found out that ‘kaya ko pala!’. For the past few weeks, I have been cooking my lunch and dinner. And I’m speaking of not the usual and easy to do meals like hotdog, or luncheon meat, or tocino. I have done pork and chicken adobo, pork sinigang, sinampalukang manok, and even Katsudon. Thanks to youtube tutorials, I learned na kaya ko pala magluto and in fact, masaya magluto! :)
My point here is, after my corporate life, I learned so much more that I haven’t thought of doing in the past — which translates to discovering some skills and talents and ideas that are actually worth learning as a person. And I’ve done it because I have a lot of time for and with myself.
- Enjoy the time and the journey
When I was starting, I was very serious about life. I was pressuring myself too much to deliver. I was too focused to the point that I was not enjoying the road. That actually leads to my anxiety and some little depression dramas. But despite that, there was never an instance when I regretted leaving my job. I may not be ready yet but it was the path I know I wanna take moving forward. And that’s been my ‘hugot’ to wake up myself to the idea of letting loose in the journey.
It’s the same thing I miss when I was in college. I forgot to enjoy my younger self. I was in a hurry to graduate, to work, forgetting that it was my last ‘hurrah’ to my student life. I don’t wanna make the same mistake that I did in the past so I realized why not just enjoy everything everyday. That’s why I incentivize myself of a vacation once in a month, usually at the end of the month to celebrate the current month and kick off the coming one. In fact, I have never been excited to be sun-kissed the way I do now. This experience is making me realized that life is way more about the successes you can brag about but the journey itself.
- Keep on dreaming until it happens
I wonder if you are familiar with Goalcast. I really love this page. They gave me so much inspirations and motivations to keep on holding on to my dreams. The success stories of each famous personality have never came easy for them. Have you ever imagined Jackie Chan being a construction worker? Or Chris Pratt as a service crew in a restaurant? How about Rita Ora handing her samples to producers as they walked out of the studio? They chased after their dreams. Now they got it. There’s just one thing that is common among the videos I watched.
Somebody gave them their breaks.
I was so inspired to wait for my time when someone will give me my break while I chase them. Obviously, they were given their breaks because they look for opportunities. As I said previously, blessings do not come to those who don’t work for it. They chased after it. Now they have it. My hopes are high that someday, I’ll get it.
That someday, maybe a ‘golden buzzer’ will be granted to me because they believe in me and in my ‘talent’. I am a big fan of US and UK Got Talent shows. I am almost teary-eyed whenever there’s a golden buzzer. I was watching when golden confettis showered upon Grace Vanderwaal’s audition. She was a raw talent but was seen potential.
My point is, someday, we’ll have our own golden buzzer, our own Simon Cowell, our own Taylor Swift for Ed Sheeran, our own movie director for Chris Pratt, our angels-in-disguise to lend their hand, believe in us and let us fly. So better to keep that dream and work on it until it happens.
Okay, this is getting too long. Hehe. I actually thought of writing something that is not as serious as this. Haha. These realizations helped me to stay focused with my goals and at the same time gave me an easy time on Earth. I am very much relaxed now, peaceful and calm. I’m not in a hurry anymore but instead just living the life day by day and enjoying the moment as often as possible.
Most importantly, do not forget to pray and stay connected with Him. Whenever I feel like to, I will pray – while driving, while doing some work, while staring blankly, while on bed, while walking, while doing anything. If you’re in the moment to silently tell Him your desires, just give yourself some few seconds. It’s not hard to do and is actually relieving. In fact, just this week, I really felt like I am very much blessed. Last Monday, I was praying for a good week and for some more opportunities. In less than few hours after I whispered my prayers, my stock prices went up and sold it to take profit. I had photobooth booking last Tuesday night for a Wednesday event, and had a call from my partner restaurant for another stint.
The power of prayer is so powerful that it can work just seconds after you say it. So do it often!
Okay, I sounded like preaching. But I hope you get something from this. Thank you for dropping by!
– Anthony
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